*Note: This is an excerpt from a larger paper.*
Abstract:
Evolution
is a powerful tool but it is one that is hard to wield. It works over
generations, not on individuals, so how can we use it to help make our modern
life better and safer? The answer is, we can’t. Not in the short term, though
it has potential as a long term solution. Our goal is to breed a special
species of chimpanzees who have evolved to withstand the extreme environment
that can be found inside a caldera. The purpose is to further research on
active volcanoes and to provide an early warning system for eruptions. In order
to begin this project the first step was to isolate a collection of chimps to
serve as breeding stock for the program. The criteria to qualify for the
breeding program included high intelligence, manual dexterity and extreme heat
resistance. The final criteria is the most difficult to find so we decided to
focus on heat resistance initially. The results were not encouraging. Of the
132 chimps that were air lifted into the Mauna Loa caldera there were zero
survivors. Our team will continue revising the experiment and will continue to
update the program as new data comes in.
The scientific community was disheartened to hear of the lack of success of your experiment. Know that we are all pulling for you. As you continue your search for chimps with extreme heat resistance, be aware that our research has shown puppies and small kittens have historically shown a high resistance to heat.
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