Initial Report on Chimp Survival in the Mauna Loa Caldera

*Note: This is an excerpt from a larger paper.*

Abstract:

                Evolution is a powerful tool but it is one that is hard to wield. It works over generations, not on individuals, so how can we use it to help make our modern life better and safer? The answer is, we can’t. Not in the short term, though it has potential as a long term solution. Our goal is to breed a special species of chimpanzees who have evolved to withstand the extreme environment that can be found inside a caldera. The purpose is to further research on active volcanoes and to provide an early warning system for eruptions. In order to begin this project the first step was to isolate a collection of chimps to serve as breeding stock for the program. The criteria to qualify for the breeding program included high intelligence, manual dexterity and extreme heat resistance. The final criteria is the most difficult to find so we decided to focus on heat resistance initially. The results were not encouraging. Of the 132 chimps that were air lifted into the Mauna Loa caldera there were zero survivors. Our team will continue revising the experiment and will continue to update the program as new data comes in.